LibDem promise on drugs leaves no stoner unturned
08/08/14 13:14 Filed in: Coalition
The leader of the Libnick Cleggocrats, Rocky Black, has promised that if the Lib-Dems win the next General Election, no one will be imprisoned for possession of drugs again. The move comes as it becomes apparent that not even a robust mass-hallucination strong enough to send the electorate gibbering into the woods for a month can help the Lib Dems win an election.
“That’s some pretty bad shit, right there”, said Black, as smoke escaped from the gaps around his eyeballs, “but just because I’m, like, obviously off my tits, doesn’t mean to say that we errr, ah, what was I saying?”
Political analysts, meanwhile, point to the possibility that even the strongest mind-altering drugs cannot bugger the brain enough to make anyone vote Liberal Democrat ever again and only hallucinations of Castaneda proportions can imagine a prospect marginally less likely than the spontaneous metamorphosis of Kenneth Clarke into a moth.
Above: The Right Hon Kenneth Clarke, MP, as a moth.